I've erased most of the words from the page. In my heart, I want to write. But, the words do not flow like they did before.
I would try a different environment—my backyard, the living room, and the library. Instead of the words flowing so easily on a page, I've felt stuck, not knowing what direction to take in this journey.
I guess you could say, I've been experiencing writer's block. It's completely normal for someone who is writing to go through seasons of not knowing what to put on paper. But, in reality, it's more than that.
As someone living with health challenges, and also passionate about helping others, I tend to push myself too hard. Then as my body tries to keep up, I end up overwhelmed and nothing gets done. This has led to many late nights and no relief from pain. Before I know it, the sound of my alarm wakes me up.
After a full week of work, my body usually feels sick on the weekend. I often try to push through the severe fatigue so I can write a blog post or continue working on another project. I would open my journal to an empty page and begin filling it with thoughts that are on my mind. Lately, though, it's become impossible to even try to continue this passion. My body is feeling too weary physically and mentally to do anything else but rest.
There have been those who have shared that my writing has encouraged them and that it has spoken to them in some way. That means a lot to me. And helps me recognize that there's a reason I'm sharing my writing. I'm not just doing it because I process my pain through words. But, to reach to those who are suffering or need to find someone who understands.
Where do I go from here? If writing is one of my passions, why do I feel too drained to put my thoughts on a page? It used to be so simple.
I only hope that in the months to come, something will change. That I will begin to share more of my writing again.
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